The Car Accident

"The Lord is good to me,
And so I thank the Lord
For giving me the things I need:
The sun and the moon and the appleseed,
The Lord is good to me."
~From the Johnny Appleseed song

Job has become a newfound hero.

This last May 16th we had a car accident. I was the driver. My first and greatest gratitude is that no other cars were involved, that David's injuries weren't worse than they were - a fractured rib and a cut on his hand that required stitches, and that Mark walked away with minor cuts and bruises. Thankfully my own were the worst. I don't know that I could calm the guilt otherwise.
I have a broken neck, a broken back, my shoulder blade was broken in 2 places, a broken arm up at the ball and socket, a fractured bone above my eye with a cut that required stitches, a 3 1/2" gash on the back of my head where they put 12 staples, and some pretty serious "road rash" on the broken arm. In addition, after looking at the x-rays they determined that a bone graft was needed in order to fuse on of the breaks in my neck in order for it to heal properly, so they surgically removed bone from my hip.
What I remember about the accident itself -
I was tired. I passed up 2 off ramps because I was looking for a rest area where I could walk around and wake up, but I fell asleep instead. I woke up to the tires rumbling over the grid at the left of the lane. I remember David reaching over to try to help me correct the stearing but it was too late and the car rolled 4 1/2 times.
When the car stopped rolling it was upside down and I was pinned between the frame of the car and the ground where the windshield had beenand I could feel the ground under me with my hands. My head was lodged and I couldn't move it. There was a lady there who encouraged me to just keep breathing and I remember being frustrated and thinking that I was trying to but air was hard to find. At the same time I realized that she was saying exactly what I would have had I been in her place. I also got a bit of a laugh because only once at the first did she say I was going to be alright, as though she might have had second thoughts about that!I must have looked rather doubtful. It was hard to breathe. I had to keep looking for pockets of air as I was lying in a pool of blood and vomit and my denture was in the way.

After about 45 minutes I couldn't find any more air. I knew it was gone and that I had done all I could do. It was at this point that I stopped fighting. The only thing left was to "let go and let God". So I breathed my last breath. I felt calm and peaceful and I knew all would be well whether I lived or died and I was okay with that. And things went dark.
After a short time, I heard those big clamps cut the car and someone pulled me out into the sunlight. Ordinarily I'd have been annoyed at having the sun in my face, but not this time! I was limp as a rag and I could hardly open my eyes, but the man said, "We need you to breathe!" and, realizing that this was now possible, I started breathing again. I was placed on a hard, smooth board and I was glad not to be on the ground in the dirt anymore.
We were taken to the emergency room at the hospital in Cedar City, Utah, where they cleaned me up, picked glass out of my head and stapled it and took all the first steps. I was then air lifted by plane to Salt Lake City and checked into the Intermountain Medical Center Trauma Unit in Murray. Because of swelling I couldn't open my eyes for 3 days, but when they put me into that hospital bed I saw the softest, whitest blankets and it felt luxurious and so comfortable...